On behalf of my brothers and sisters, Yollie, Alex, Leo, Richard, Tricia and myself, I’m Ceci (or CC or Sissy) but it really doesn’t matter what you call me as long as I know who I am at the end of the day. We’d like to thank you for coming here today to help us celebrate the life of our precious mother, Fina Urrutia.
I am not here to quanitfy or qualify anyone’s relationship with my mom. We all have great memories, but only one of us could speak- for 3 minutes- so if I start to sound like an auctioneer, youll know why.
At first, the task of giving the eulogy was given to our honorary brother Doc Schneider who we certainly love dearly… and even though he’s won an award argueing in the Supreme Court, I knew he wouldn’t mind if I insisted on sharing about who my mother was.
I must say how surprised I am that she outlived our father. He was the robust, healthy, outgoing one and she was right at home in his shadow. It’s no wonder, in a Universe that is literally, constantly expanding that we are meant to expand also. This quiet, submissive, shy woman is absolute proof that we are all expanding, in that life gets better and better. God wants our cups to overflow and hers sure did.
It’s a shame that Hollywood literally teaches that the best way to write a script is the rollercoaster with ups and downs and plot twists- as if it’s just too boring to just get better and better. Well, after 50 years of wedded bliss, my father passed and we all wondered how mom would take it. Of course she missed him dearly and talked of him so often, but as time would tell, her memory would not.
Whether she had dementia or Alzheirmers, it really doesn’t matter. The most outstanding gift of her condition is that she bloomed into a beautiful witty, charming, outgoing woman. And she took every opportunity to talk to strangers, growing more beautiful with age. And why did she improve so much with each waking moment? Because she no longer had the mental capacity to hold on to negative memories, hold grudges, embrace resentment or be friends with jealousy.
The blessing for her was that she was right where she belonged- where we all belong- in the beautiful powerful now. A drive to Dothan, a cup of coffee, a shower, a fun game, she listed the positive aspects of those experiences and she was so grateful and she spoke those words out loud. She did what we are all called to do- count our blessings- go specific as possible when things are great, and as general or maybe even silent when things are not. Her strong faith in the Holy trinity and her passion for Mary was clear to see and she was incapable of ending a phone convo without saying “God bless you.”
We’ve all heard that Laughter is the best medicine and my all time favorite thing was to make her laugh. We kept each other in stitches. After Dad passed she lived in Dothan for about 5 years and then moved near me in in PC for 5 years and most mornings I’d call to say good morning and it usually went like this.
Me, “Good morning how are you today?”
Mom, “Fine. I slept like a baby.”
Me, “WEll, you know why don’t you?”
Me, “Because you ARE a baby!”
Such a thrill to me to hear her crack up laughing!
Sometimes we’d be in my car running errands. She’d often ask to borrow my Lipstick. On one occasion she pulled down the visor mirror, took a good long look and said, “Boy I must be getting older because I just keep getting uglier and uglier. And without missing a beat I said, “Oh no, when I was little you were a lot uglier. I thing you keep getting prettier and prettier.” She literally threw her head back in laughter.
At Provision Living- the assisted living facility where she lived next to me, she was everyone’s favorite. She was voted Mardi Gras Queen two years in a row, but was also the queen of her table. She told all the jokes and kept everyone in stiches. She always asked the nurses for a beer with her pills, until one day a nurse asked me if they should really get her one. No that’s just mom just trying to get a rise out of someone!
Well about a year ago, Mom got seriously ill and we learned that she only had one functioning kidney and that was just 30%. The first time she got dialysis it was literally life saving- the process of filtering the blood, removing toxins, keeping electrolytes in balance. I am amazed that our God created something so small and man in his greatest wisdom can only make a machine so big….
This last year was often difficult as we siblings struggled to make sense of how to move forward regarding Mom’s health. None of us were right or wrong- we simply had different perspectives of who she was to us. Like the fable about the six blind men touching the elephant. 6 perspectives. All different. All seemingly right. But none taking in the big picture. I see this. I see that. Well, we’ll return to the elephant in just a minute.
I am convinced that the hearstrings connecting my mother to her 6 children were made of titanium, no matter where each one lived, no matter how often she saw them it simply didn’t matter. Last week, I had a restless night- tossing and turning trying to wrap my head around the situation. My Tre’ who is almost 3 and is adopted was sleeping on the floor by my bed. Suddenly he sat straight up and said, “I need to tell Mama I love her.” I reached out and took him into my arms to cuddle him in bed. This speaks volumes about the heartstrings connecting every mother to her children.
Every time mom saw Tre’ she’d ask, “Is he yours?” Me, “Yes Mama.” Mom, “Who would give away a beautiful baby like that?” Me, “Someone who could have done something worse, someone who knew we needed a little boy to love.” Just like the movie Groundhog Day, she’d repeat this line of questioning about 5 times in the next 5 mins. I was tempted once or twice to have a little fun by getting real creative and giving far out ridiculous answers to her repetitive questions, but I refrained.
She had a sharp wit. Our neighbor Nat, an orthotist/prosthetist, you know one who makes and fits artificial limbs for those in need, stopped in to see her one day at Healthsouth. “Hi, I’m Nat, Ceci and George are my next door neighbors. Mom immediately piped up, “Well are you bragging or complaining?”
She loved to play cards and about two weeks ago we played Kings Corners at my inlaws’ house- Cion and Dino. My father-in-law stood by looking at her cards, and trying to help he reached in to point at a card she held to suggest that she put it down. Without missing a beat or moving her eyes she grabbed his finger so tight and just held it while studying her cards to the point that I had to get up to pry his fingers out of her death grip.
Now let’s revisit the elephant. This time let me tell you what I think about certain parts of the elephant as they relate to mom. My perspective. The Heart- well, that would be my brother Leo because anyone who knows him knows he has a heart bigger than all outdoors. a servants heart. the errand boy. He loved to visit mom and take her shopping just to see what trouble they could get into driving the electric wheelchairs. The brain- well half goes to my brother Richard and half to my brother Alex. They share the strong qualities of gathering all the facts, processing them and being as objective as possible. Considering all options. The Lungs- that would be my sister Yollie as her gift is to breathe life and energy into every room she enters. Energizer bunny and upbeat..
The Legs, those would be my sister Tricia and her devoted husband Tony because they carried the weight of responsiblity of caring for mom and dad in Dothan with a dedication and love unsurpassed by any. You will never know all the small, medium and large gestures of caring for an elderly parent unless you walk in their shoes.
The Ivory tusks.- I need to single Tricia out on this one as that rare commodity- in her deliberate choice to stay in Dothan, when she could have gone anywhere. What a treasure for parents to have one child who remains nearby- and she did it out of desire not obligation.
Where does that leave me? I see myself as the kidneys of the elephant. I feel as though I spent the last 5 years and the last one especially, filtering out all the toxins from Mom’s life, by that I mean the forgetfulness, the moments of confusion, etc. I deliberately focused on circulating the beautiful stories of all her “good blood” all her positive aspects.
I urge you to let go of any negativity from your past; fear, hate, jealousy, regret and refuse to bring that into your powerful positive NOW moment. Whether you have one great memory of this amazing woman or one million- it doesn’t matter because in the eternal nature of a memory- one is all you need.
You don’t have to get dementia or Alzheimers to let go of the hurt from the past. Make a deliberate choice. Practice letting it go sooner and sooner and go play a game, cards, bingo, it gets better with time. A week at my sister’s was a week of bliss for my mom, surrounded by family, games, a beautiful room, constant attention. I’d take that one week any day over another year in a facility where she often felt lonely and anxious.
I’m convinced God speaks to us through others as the last time I saw my mother fully alive she was sitting in her brown chair. She leaned forward and said, unsolicited, “You know I have so much to be thankful for I have my family, this beautiful room… not everybody has what I have. Some people have nothing. If you see someone sitting alone you should walk up to them and say, “Hi how are you today?” Me, “Yes, Mama you do have a lot to be thankful for.”
My mother signed several cards thru my life time like this- “I love you little I love you big. I love you like a little pig.” So here’s a convenient little segue to invite you to come pig out with us after the funeral around 1:00 at my sister Tricia’s house if you’d like to come share some memories of my Mom. Thank you for loving our Mother and God Bless you!
Aha! I just realized that I’m not who I think I AM!! I like to think I’m all Miss Positive and Happy Happy and I just got caught. Let’s just say I caught on to the disturbing fact that I struggle with accepting and receiving. When others compliment me in any way, I find myself responding with a knee-jerk reaction of borderline negativity-ish-ism-speak. A new friend brought this to my attention indirectly by reacting to a positive comment I made to her. She simply replied, “I accept and receive that blessing.” Wow! That felt empowering. So, if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to have a little convo with the Universe… Well, and since I’m addicted to the simplicity of the alphabet… here goes.
Being of (somewhat) sound mind and body, I do hereby ACCEPT & RECEIVE the following, but surely not limited to such- since the Universe always has even better things in store for me.
I accept and receive my…
My amazing, intelligent, kind and wonderful girlfriend just replied to my post on FB.
What’d she say? Oh, I posted something about the Law of Attraction and how our world we see is a result of our current vibration. If you don’t like what you’re watching/experiencing then change your vibration.
She said, “I need help changing my vibration.” Ha! She’s so got this and it’s so easy it’s heart! She simply has to click her Ruby Red Slippers and go straight to her happy place. (FYI- this Happy Place can be achieved in infinite ways so don’t go projecting on others what you think THEY should do to get happy)
God has adorned each and every one of us with a pair of Ruby Red Slippers- though I hear the style is a tad different for the males of the world- but sometimes we all need reminding that They. Are. There.
Here are some simple, but Divine “Dorothy Don’ts” to avoid while the shoes are in operation.
1. Don’t think you need help using them. Click your heels 3 times and go to your nearest happy place.
(Zumba, Running, The Beach, Washing the Car, Karaoke, Preparing Your Taxes- hey it takes all kinds!)
2. Don’t think for one minute the shoes are too fancy. The old “I am not worthy” lie.
3. Don’t fret because someone had to die so you could have these. (It was meant to be- silly- her time was up!)
4. Don’t yammer on to every Munchkin you know about all the drama you’ve experienced on the Yellow Brick Road (your Life’s path)… Move on already. The heels are waiting.
5. Don’t ever forget… I repeat… don’t ever forget- that these are Forever Adorned on your feet and cannot be removed. They are always there, just waiting to be activated. Always. You are either in the clicking position or you are not.
So if you should ever find that you are “not in Kansas anymore” (not in your happy place) just remember it’s so easy to activate the Ruby Red Slipper Solution- in fact, It’s So Easy- It’s HEART!
What? Are you still here? Go on! Follow your heart to your nearest happy place!
She doesn’t even know me, and yet she’d hate to be me! Why can’t she simply say this about herself– “I love being ME!” Why hate?
Well, I’m a quirky-quarky girl, so I must digress with a little story that promises to come in handy later in this post.
I love home-made smoothies! I love to place my order with my daughter, Mia for a banana, strawberry, blueberry shake, complete with vanilla protein mix. I would say it’s “good to the last drop”, but anyone who’s ever made a smoothie knows that the last 50 drops are about as elusive as Al Capone on a cold, dark Chicago night. In fact, within mere seconds, that last bit of drink transforms to cement before my very eyes. The trick is to fill the blender up with water- immediately, to keep the Quickcrete from setting. All. The. Way! Leaving 3-4 inches of purple slime on the walls of the blender simply defeats my efforts of soaking the blender at all. Why bother? Now, back to the Facebook story. I’ll return to this blender drama in a minute.
A few days ago I commented on a friend’s post on FaceBook. The post was pertaining to spirituality and religion and the opinion (held here) that there are many paths up the mountain. My friend’s friend, an atheist jumped in to give her two-cents worth and together we agreed that others need to be free to express who they are without the need for approval from any of the other 7 billion people on the planet…. and still maintain the ability to give and receive Unconditional Love!
Meanwhile, a fly on the wall (another friend of The Friend) chimed into our convo to simply say, “I’d hate to be you guys.” Chirping crickets here.
Neither of us responded to her. Immediately I thought, why can’t WE, when faced with opinions WE vehemently oppose, simply say- I love being me! It’s a much better way to add a tiny dose of LOVE to the world’s energy for the day instead of jumping on the HATE bandwagon.
I wonder what her religious background is (just a morbid curiosity)? I wonder if she’s subject to this illusion of separation. This vision of the brain, or the heart where we have the things, people, experiences we HATE on one side and all the things we love on the other.
Got news for her… for us… for me… I simply cannot hold two opposing views in my head or heart at the same time. I AM either loving or I am not and anything less than that just jerks me off my path with God.
Seriously, think of walking a high wire over Niagara Falls. Every beautiful, loving, joyful thought keeps you steadfastly balanced on the thin wire. In the same way, every criticism, judgement, hate-mongering comment tugs at your center of gravity, lurching you toward the ground. (note to self- this includes every bit of griping about a not-so-perfect meal in a restaurant)
We give ourselves credit for every bit of LOVE we do have, for our select subject matter, as if that will carry us all the way. However, we are only as pure and lovely as our last thought!
I see so many friends on FB expressing their offense at certain “foul language”, and never giving the most damaging, most vile ones a second thought. The only “F” word that should really offend is FEAR. Why? I contend that every misaligned act since time began- from every person, group, religion, corporation- stems from the bedrock of this most heinous “F” word/belief system.
So back to the blender-
Cleaning up just half of your negative thoughts is not very effective. This means, no whining, no criticizing, no venting… And isn’t it just easier to say, “Look around and just count your blessings and seek out those things that you can be grateful for.”
Now I get it! That very large man wearing the “Hey Hater” t-shirt was talking to me a year ago at Publix. I was so offended by his message that I nearly walked up to him in the produce department, right by the tomatoes (handy for pummeling) to demand why he would wear such a hate-inducing shirt. Me? Of all people! I thought I wrote the book on love and now I know. Every time I open my mouth to point out anything of a negative nature- I am a little
hater lover… just needing a little reminder to stay on the wire. It’s so easy- it’s hard HEART!
If you’re here looking for some sort of Sweeny Todd-ish method of transforming your least favorite person into meat pies, then you’ve come to the wrong place.
Here’s my list of the top ten hidden uses for your enemies:
1. They promptly show you how you don’t want to be, time and again.
2. They offer you plenty of opportunities to practice unconditional love.
3. They help you focus on “putting your hand to the plow”, giving each new encounter a fresh perspective.
4. They jerk you back to your blissful NOW, where your sweet children and grocery list patiently wait, in sharp contrast to the seemingly annoying memories of what he/she said or did.
5. They make great doorstops. (I threw this one in just to see if you are paying attention)
6. They reflect what you need to learn. Yes, (repeat after me) they either exhibit behavior that you’re guilty of- to a small degree- OR they prove that you have a long-standing expectation of them that needs to be released.
7. They are messengers from God to test your skills of speaking only of beautiful, wanted things ONLY!
8. They can be boiled down in a large pot for 10 minutes, thus making a great liver cleanse if you dare to partake. (Again, not a Freudian slip- just a mild attempt to see if you are still with me.)
9. They drive home the point that you are LOVERS and when you are not LOVING (you know, like when you’re venting and fuming with a third party about what was said or done) we feel bad!
10. They provide the Ultimate Test to see if you can see them as Jesus does- at the very core of who they are, they are beautiful and wonderful!
Expect the BLEST!
Forget the REST!
Life makes so much sense! Go figure!
Well, we really don’t have to because God has it all figured out! Literally.
And He doesn’t take sides or even force His opinion because then we wouldn’t have Free Choice.
Frequency. Frequency. It’s all about Frequency. And two kinds of Frequency, no less.
Let’s use College Football as an analogy for the All That Is to examine why anything happens to anyone.
I AM a proud Auburn graduate and Tiger football fan and if you know anything about SEC football, you know that it’s Us against Them. Yeah, Auburn against Alabama… aka “The Role Tide.”
Now, let’s look at the two meanings of Frequency that will make us all “Know-It-Alls” by the end of my post.
First, we have the Frequency of How Often Something Occurs.
Second, we have the Energy Frequency of every atom in the Universe and beyond. Everything in the world, you, me a rock, a germ, a computer, a rose… even a thought and a word has its own unique energy frequency. Especially a thought and word!! This is why our thoughts and words are so important- magnets attracting similar thoughts and ideas into our basket of grey matter.
So let’s get back to the game in progress… It’s the Iron Bowl- truly the most important game in
SEC football the entire WORLD! The stadium is standing room only!!! Both teams playing their hearts out!
Everyone in the stadium is Co-Creating this most significant event by sending up prayers, thoughts, (which are actually prayers-in-disguise since God can’t NOT hear your every thought and the intention behind it!), frustrations, reactions, “coaching” comments, curse words… etc.
So picture a melting pot where everyone is throwing their personal thoughts into the mix.
1. First FREQUENCY- How frequently is each person sending up the thought? Constantly, intermittently, just once, for years (some are born into the life of the SEC and feel supreme from day one. Just ask a Tide fan.)
2. Second FREQUENCY- What is the energy frequency of the thought. A “We suck!” right after a fumble on the ten yard line is a lower frequency thought than a “that’s okay- we got ’em right where we want ’em. War Eagle!” And just imagine all the rockets of desire being sent up by the coaches and players. All the psychological mind games being played out? A positive thought/emotion has a higher frequency than a negative thought/emotion. And whatever you do, don’t leave the stadium when your team is 20 points behind with 2 minutes left in the 4th quarter. With God- and a change of heart/thought/attitude… ANYTHING is possible!
I believe that God just sits back while the entire game is Figured out very systematically, non-judgementally. It just IS what it IS. A situation where the Laws of the Universe play out according to Frequency X Frequency of all the people involved.
Some would like to think that God takes sides, but I don’t think he Loves the most popular religious leader any more than he Loves the “lowest of the low.” He is the One and Only LIGHT SWITCH just waiting at all times to be turned on. Some would like to think, “Well, I’ve had my light on all my life and “He” just turned his on this minute.” Our lives can turn on a dime, and at the end of the day, the wages are all the same! Whether you’ve labored (embraced JOY) all your life or just came for the last hour of labor (embracing JOY) the wages are all the same- a life of abundant Peace, Joy, Love & Blessings!
So let’s mind the Frequency and Frequency of our thoughts and watch the world around us change. And, if that sounds too much like homework then go straight to your happy place- singing, dancing, fishing, golfing OR the tailgate party right outside of the biggest game this side of the SUN! WARRRRRRRRR EAGLE!!
Happy 4th of July and infinite thanks goes to all who give of their time, talents and lives to keep our country free!!
Freedom! Are you really free? This is not a trick question, nor is it intended to be political, but I sure do want you to think outside the box!
Are you free to do what you love most?
Free to travel coast to coast?
Free to shop at any store?
To dine somewhere and ask for more?
Free to fly out on a whim,
See foreign lands and Uncle Jim,
Free to donate any sum
To children living in the slum.
Free to start your own foundation,
Freely give to any nation?
Free to climb up any mountain,
Install a pool or backyard fountain?
Free to spend on anything
A boat, or even how to sing?
Your cup is meant to overflow
Stop feeling guilty, don’t say “No!”
To all the blessings you receive
Just be grateful and believe…
I AM worthy!
Divine Providence has led me to a business that enables me to help others with their health and their wealth. You’ll never hear me complain about Healthcare or Social Security (or lack thereof) because I’m all about the Self-empowerment this business offers. No more trading hours for dollars in this household! I AM happy and grateful for every person and every choice that led me here. I AM happy and grateful for true FREEDOM!!! So watch out NYC!!! Here I come!!!
P.S. Message me for more information on my business. Of course, that’s only if you want to help others with their health and wealth too 🙂